Are we singular or multiple?

I think many would consider this a very strange question! It’s also a question most have never considered before and therefore probably don’t know what it means. Yet, in my view, it is an important question because the answer will determine what therapeutic approach a person will engage in. So, here is my simple attempt to unpack the concepts of singular or multiple. There is no right or wrong intended in this piece, simply an opportunity to understand a bit more about how there are different ways to view and address things.

I’ll start with my basic and probably totally oversimplified understanding of singular thinking. The idea is that as a person grows through different stages of life; infancy - toddlerhood - childhood - adolescence - adulthood and old age, each new stage entails the end of the current phase and the start of the next. To embrace the next phase requires relinquishing the present one. It’s like a rocket ship that blasts from earth into outer space. Once the first huge section of the rocket ship achieves the task of lift-off and initial thrust, it falls away and the next section takes over to fulfil it’s special purpose. Then it too falls away as the next section takes over. The idea here is that once a section has done it’s job, it is discarded because not only is it no longer needed, it’s ongoing presence would hinder the next phase. Another way to look at it is through the various stages in the life cycle of a butterfly; egg - caterpillar - chrysalis - butterfly. Each stage is separate and distinct. So, applying these models to humans, a person is always singular, one thing at a time.

By contrast, multiple thinking suggests that when a person graduates from one stage to the next, the preceding stage remains. Perhaps the babushka doll is a useful way to demonstrate this phenomenon. For those unfamiliar with this Russian creation, the babushka doll is a hollow wooden bowling pin shaped figure painted with human features. Within the doll is another smaller version of the same doll and within that smaller version is an even smaller one and so on. Each doll can be pulled apart to reveal the one contained inside. If you follow this concept, multiple thinking takes the view that previous life stages like childhood and adolescence are like inner babushka dolls. Instead of jettisoning earlier incarnations, they are kept and added onto. So, an adult person is a combination of life’s current and preceding stages co-existing in the one body.

It is mostly in dealing with childhood trauma issues like sexual abuse, domestic violence, neglect, adoption, loss etc that the different approach of the two models plays out. Those who operate from the singularity model would generally take the view that since the trauma is in the past, it is no longer a part of the person’s current life. So the goal is to find ways to stop past memories interfering with the present. To achieve this, some strategies entail acknowledging memories when they come but then consciously choosing to let them go and focus on something in the present. The hope is that these intrusive and unwanted stories will gradually and eventually slip out of conscious memory, no longer interfering with present day life.

On the other hand, those operating from the multiple perspective, believe that the trauma experiences from the past are still here in the present because the traumatised child is still here in the present. Consequently, the therapeutic process involves the client consciously making a compassionate connection with the traumatised younger person and then through that relationship helping them to heal from the trauma. The hope is that as healing progresses, the negative impact of the trauma will gradually diminish and memories will become less distressing.

I see therapists operate from both of these perspectives and as I said at the beginning, in my mind, there is no right or wrong. The reason I have written about them is that I think it is helpful for people to be conscious of why they do what they do. I hope that in reading this, it may assist the reader be clearer of the position they hold and why they hold it, whether as a therapist or a client. Then, that clarity of perspective will guide how they work with the issue. For the client, I hope it will assist them decide with whom they choose to work with on the issue. As for me, I resonate with the multiple model. It has been useful in helping me understand myself and I find most of my clients also relate to it. Consequently, it has informed my work for a long time.